There was a fight between two bears
In the night on the stairs
One called Fred one called joe
One banged his head one hurt his toe
When morning came what a disaster
With themselves to blame they were covered in plaster
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THE ARTICLES
In the field of physics and chemistry
Out of every jot and tittle
The atom was smallest there could be
It was so very little
But we found a way to split it
Now that we are so much wiser
Even tinier bits emitte...
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Trying to co-ordinate the children's Christmas Nativity
When a million things can go wrong.
One little angel has a gippy tummy.
Now who in the class is her understudy?
One little soul has broken her tissue-paper wings.
Does anyon...
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Words I'd Like To Say
If I could have one true wish and never have another
It would be to have one more hour with you my father
I love to put pen to paper writing words I'd like to say
Wishing hoping, praying you'll one day be b...
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Today i went to Iceland
The supermarket not the place
Trying to find a short queue
Turns into a race
Elderly lady at the back
Tries to jump the queue
Those further forward voice their anger
"“Hey, we were here before yo...
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'Christmas present shopping'
I took myself home through the shops
To get ideas you see
I knew I wouldn't last that long
Bent back soon breaking me
*****
Shoppers happy, excited smiles
Five minutes in for me is miles
Try on ...
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'Trump'
Oh Donald you're really quite thick
Your 'policies' make me feel sick
No respect for the law or the truth
Your manner beyond the uncouth
You prove money may buy any farce
But seems it can't buy you that class
Ignora...
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'The things I bump in to'
Oh the things I bump into
Not just coz I'm tired
I'm clumsy like a foal
And stumble like a child
When my forehead smacks umbrella
It makes my old man laugh
I'd probably lop my head off
If wasn...
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"With his head bowed so low, Charlie strikes all the poses,
as he stands there like Slash, from the great Guns'n' Roses,
acoustic, or electric, two very different sounds,
but when our Charlie let's rip! each guitar holds no bounds,...
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Jog daily,
smile happily,
exercise regularly,
be healthy.
Read regularly,
write occasionally,
speak nicely,
behave wisely.
Earn money,
save penny,
spend rightly,
be wealthy.
Take deep breath,
cheer to depth,
do m...
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"I will tell you a little story, about my young grandson jack,
when he's riding on his motorbike, he has definitely got the knack!
He reaches top speed easily, without showing signs of fear,
He is an absolute whiz-kid, when he thro...
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There was going to be a ghost hunt tonight
In scaringham castle at the edge of the wood
A very famous television medium would be there
The advert promised that it would be good
The sign outside stated "Ghost hunt"
H...
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Was beach wet Because the Seaweed
Can a Razor Clam Give you a Shave
Are Those Really White Horses
At the Crest OF Every Wave
Can a Fiddler Crab Play a Fiddle
Does a Hermit Crab Live Alone
Is the Wind on the Shore Miserab...
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Does a moon fish light the sea at night
Does a sun fish shine all day
Is a clown fish really so funny
Does a monk fish really pray
Does a trigger fish hold a handgun
does a basking shark bask all the day
Will a horseshoe cra...
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There was Sorcerer Called Edward
He Lived in A Hole in the Ground
Covered With Twigs and Bracken
With Spiders were all Around
The Spiders Webs Were Everywhere
The Spiders Were Free to Roam
Edward Liked Them Being There
In the ...
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Does a lungfish really breathe
Does an archer fish hold a bow
Does an arrow fish have a quiver
Can a Blow fish really blow
Can a banjo fish play a rhythm
Does a Bombay duck have a bill
Does a bearded fish have a goatee
...
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Sitting in the pharmacy
looking at the pills
Some to cure a headache
Some to cure your chills
On a stand are hanging
multicoloured nail files
Next to the preparation H
To help you with your piles
Pills to help go on a...
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I look into the mirror
And who is that I see?
Someone I don't recognise
Is looking back at me
The lines upon the forehead
That are called ‘worry lines'
Are caused by getting stressed
Far too many times
A line next to...
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The local 'Balancing Pond that buffers the various tributaries feeding the Blackwater River, is a haven for varieties of water fowl. Resident or sojourning there you can see: mute swans, raucous Canada geese (these North Americans!) m...
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Sam the dog and Pearl the cat
Were sitting on the wall
They do it every day
So it isn't strange at all
They have little conversations
Which only they can understand
They talk about their little quirks
And none of them ...
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