Hopeless vs Hopeful

My Dr. tells me I have a condition that alters my moods on a regular basis. Sometimes I feel good and optimistic, like maybe I can have a good peaceful life.  On those days I write, read, go for walks and bake for my kids.
On a "low" day, I can't get off the couch, I feel like a complete failure, I can't do anything right.  My life will always be hard and I will remain unhappy forever.
This has been my life for as long as I can remember. My heart is tired, I want to be "normal" but don't really know what that is.
How can I ever live good peaceful life, when I'm constantly on a roller coaster?  How much can my Dr. help me with medications and counseling? 
I have reached the point where I realize I have nothing...nothing else but the Lord to hold my hand in this world.  He is the only one I can count on, he is the only one who comforts me regardless of my failures.
My everlasting love  for him is the only comfort I can rely on. No matter how much people claim to love me, somehow they always hurt me.  

 

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